Town Hall’s Want‑Ads, Served With a Side of Sarcasm
FARMINGTON, Conn. — The Town Clerk’s bulletin board looks like a Black Friday doorbuster for civic duty. Six paid positions jostle for attention next to a gallery of volunteer seats—proof that democracy occasionally comes with payroll.
The Paid Gigs 💼
- Clerk Confidential — The Administrative Clerk will juggle ringing phones and hush‑hush memos in the Town Manager’s office. Pay hits $69k if you spell “municipal” without looking it up.
- Flames & Paperwork — Firefighters must bring Firefighter 2, EMT and a CDL‑B tank endorsement—but also the stamina to fill out an online form twice.
- Fore‑! — The Golf Starter’s main enemy is slow foursomes. Diplomacy recommended; driver optional.
- Code Enforcer — The Building Official earns $48 an hour to quote the Connecticut Basic Building Code—like Shakespeare, but with more concrete.
- Part‑Time Hose Hero — $20 an hour plus the joy of live‑fire training. Must attend 15 classes, survive CPAT and pretend the alarm tone is soothing.
- Fun Director — The Recreation Coordinator programs pickleball leagues and youth trips, proving spreadsheets can, in fact, sweat.
Board Seats, No Pay, Plenty of Meetings 🗳️
The Town Clerk (860‑675‑2380) is farming out vacancies from Architectural Design Review to the North Central Regional Mental Health Board. If Robert’s Rules of Order is your love language, there’s a chair waiting.
Particulars:
- Justice of the Peace (2025‑2029) — marry strangers, avoid in‑laws.
- Green Efforts Committee — indefinite term; recycle jokes as well as plastics.
- Veterans Memorial Committee — two overlapping slots, because everyone loves a good overlap.
- Volunteer Fire Department — Contact Tom Fitzgerald at 860‑675‑2322; bring courage and maybe cookies.
- Community & Social Services — Dial Nancy Parent at 860‑675‑2390 if you enjoy paperwork with heart.
Sponsor Shout‑Out (in a roomy storage unit)
The Farmington Mercury is fueled—like my third espresso—by Farmington Storage (155 Scott Swamp Rd., Farmington; 860‑777‑4001). Climate‑controlled lockers so fancy your childhood trophies will demand rent. Mention this article and they’ll store your committee nametag at no extra charge.*
*Not a binding offer, but they laughed when we asked.
About the Author ☕️
Jack Beckett sips dark roast strong enough to notarize itself and files dispatches for The Farmington Mercury from a desk littered with meeting agendas and golf‑course tee sheets. When caffeine fails, he proofreads bylaws for sport.
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© 2025 The Farmington Mercury / Mercury Local
This article, “Six Jobs and a Dozen Boards: Where to Work—or Volunteer—in Farmington, CT,” by Jack Beckett is licensed under CC BY‑ND 4.0.
“Six Jobs and a Dozen Boards: Where to Work—or Volunteer—in Farmington, CT”
by Jack Beckett, The Farmington Mercury (CC BY‑ND 4.0